Vicky Chandler tells of becoming a life coach

Jan 14 2009 by Hilarie Stelfox, Huddersfield Daily Examiner

Former professional bassoonist Vicky Chandler went into life coaching to find a new direction for herself and ended up becoming a life coach. She talked to HILARIE STELFOX about how her experience of raising a child with special needs has helped her access a new career

AS A professional musician Vicky Chandler was used to working unsocial hours and travelling up and down the country.

But when the first of her two sons came along she soon realised hers was not a career that could be juggled alongside motherhood, particularly as her eldest, Tim, 14, has Asperger’s Syndrome, a form of autism.

Since that time Vicky, who was a freelance bassoonist with the BBC Philharmonic Orchestra, has dealt with the challenges of raising a special needs child, latterly as a single parent.

For nine years she was a full-time housewife and mother.

Then 16 months ago her younger son, William, 12, developed a rare condition called transverse myelitis.

“He was originally diagnosed with a tumour in his neck. He lost all motor skills in his arms. Then we were told it was inflammation of his spinal cord.

“He has got his motor skills back, but he was very poorly and still has a weakness in his right arm and shoulder,” said Vicky, 43.

William’s illness meant that Vicky had to shelve plans to return to work as a musician; she’d been working as the manager of the Halifax-based Yorkshire Youth Orchestra but was shortlisted for a place in a professional trio.

“There is no question that I have had a lot on my plate. After William was poorly I had to take lots of time off and was quite shaken up by it,” she said.

By chance Vicky read about life coaching and wondered whether it could be useful to her, both personally and as a potential career.

“I needed a job that would fit in better with my life and in which I could use my skills. There have been times when I have felt sorry for myself, but I’ve thought ‘you can get up and use some of that experience’,” said Vicky.

“Having a child with autism means that you learn not to judge people or their situation. When you are on the receiving end of being judged you know it’s not very nice.

“I think it has made me particularly observant, as well as having empathy and compassion. I’ve had to battle for years to get the right educational provision for Tim so I know what it’s like to struggle,” she added.

Vicky enrolled on a weekend taster course in Crewe with The Coaching Academy, but says she went along with a healthy dose of scepticism.

“I’m really cynical and did question what was being said. The others on the course seemed much more willing to buy into it without questioning.

“I came away with both a positive and negative experience and decided to explore it further,” said Vicky, who had already taken courses in IT and management but didn’t really know what she wanted to do.

After further life coaching training courses, compiling case studies and sitting exams, Vicky was won over and now has her qualification from the academy, working part-time at the Colne Valley Clinic in Marsden.

She’s been coaching for over a year.

Life coaching, she says, differs from counselling. “Counselling goes over specific areas in the past, which someone might be struggling with, while coaching is a forward-looking process and goal driven.

“A coach believes in the client’s own resources to deal with problems. We ask questions and reflect the answers back.

“When they listen to themselves the answer often becomes clear. It’s about thinking positively inside and not dwelling on the negative,” says Vicky.

“When people talk to a friend or a relative such people always have a bias of opinion and will usually be on your side. But a coach doesn’t offer an opinion or advice; they offer an ear and then ask searching questions so that the person finds their own answers, empowering them,” she added.

Vicky accepts that because life coaching is, as yet, unregulated, there are untrained practitioners setting up shop.

“This does give coaching a bad name, but if done well the coaching process can be truly life-changing. I get a real buzz from it when clients are excited by the results,” she said.

Further details about coaching are available from vickychandler@rocketmail.com