AS I mention in the piece above, we’re already on the countdown to Christmas.

Over the past few years I’ve been increasingly poor at buying presents and been left running around retails parks and shopping centres on December 23.

Last year, among an avalanche of hastily purchased items, I bought my better half some clothes.

These all got taken back because they weren’t the right size.

She took it in good spirit. Well, I think she did but to be fair she could just be storing it up as ammunition for any future argument.

But this year I’m determined to buy early.

I’ve already started to plan what people should get - and there’s the trouble.

We all buy presents for friends who buy us presents - when neither of us want to buy the other presents.

It’s often some historical relic that there are gifts bought for people you barely see any more.

They buy the gifts for the same reason as you - because they fear you’ll buy them one and if they fail to hand you a little something.

But this year is different, a clean break if you will.

There will be no gifts bought for people in the above category.

So if you see me in a petrol station on Christmas Day trying to wrap some engine oil and a pack of charcoal briquettes you know I lost my bottle at the last minute.