SOMEONE sent me a picture of the town sign of Boring in Oregon. Who on earth decided to call it Boring? Have they never been to Oldham on a wet Wednesday?

But this was no comment on the ambience of a place that is domicile for 8,000 citizens. It was actually named after an early resident – William H Boring – although locals with a sense of humour have twinned it with Dull in Perth, Scotland, and use the slogan: ‘Boring – the most exciting place to live.’

This, of course, set me on the trail of other places that rejoice in daft names and I didn’t have to look far in America. The same state of Oregon boasts Idiotville. This was such an isolated spot that it was said only an idiot would work and live there and so it got its name. They were right – it’s now a ghost town.

Texas has Looneyville, but then, it’s Texas, so no-one should be surprised, Tennessee has Nameless, South Carolina has Welcome, North Dakota has Zap, while South Dakota is where Bat Cave is located. Hell is in Michigan, a town that freezes over every winter, Alabama has Muck City which obviously needs a bit of fettling and Arizona has Why.

Why? Because it does.

There’s an Accident in Maryland, a state which also boasts the lesser known Hollywood where they don’t make movies. Christmas is in Florida, Colin and Worms are in Nebraska, Eek is in Alaska and Squabbletown in California.

Kansas is a virtual United Nations of a place with towns called Cuba, Denmark, Holland, Rome and Zurich.

There are lots of Hookers all over the US but the strangest place has to be Ware in Massachusetts.

“Ware are you from?”

“How did you know that?”

“No. Ware are you from?”

“That’s right. I’m from Ware.”

“That’s what I’m trying to find out. Ware exactly?”

“Ware, Massachusetts.”

There is plenty of vulgarity around in America and Europe, which I have attempted to avoid and there are those on the internet who make fun of our own Penistone, but I did like the little town of Middlefart in Denmark.

Britain has Bottom Flash and Buttocks, Beer and Booze and Droop – which presumably is what you get from the previous two – the splendidly named Throcking in Stevenage, and the wonderful Idle in Bradford.

And yes, there really is an Idle Workingmen’s Club.