A READER who describes himself as Mr No Name has sent me a Christmas party and evening menu for a local hostelry. And very good it looks: a delicious choice for starter, main course and dessert, all for £18 50 a head.

A surprise, too, for those who opt for cheese and biscuits, as this comes with “traditional crudities”.

What's this? Roy Chubby Brown coming round to deliver his very own brand of ho ho ho? A custard pie in the face?

As Mr No Name points out, it should be crudités, with an acute accent over the “e”, but the printer made an error. Actually, I think I prefer crudities. It completes a first rate menu with a laugh.