UZBEKISTAN has banned Valentine’s Day on February 14.

Just to make sure no one is the mood for a bit of how’s your father, they have also cancelled all concerts and events that might conceivably contain anything that could induce feelings of an amorous nature.

Instead, residents of the capital Tashkent have been told to read the poems of the Mughal Emperor Babur who died in the 16th century.

Zahir-ud-din Muhammad Babur, to give him his full name, was a descendant of Genghis Khan, and particularly liked cutting the heads off people he conquered and building towers with them.

So there’s not going to be a lot of romance in his poetry:

Sacked a city

I do love power

Cut off their heads

and built a tower.

Uzbekistan is a landlocked nation in Central Asia and is not the most liberal of countries. There is no political opposition and torture is systematic. The official newspaper has called Valentine’s Day the work of “forces with evil goals bent on putting an end to national values”. Like torture.

And who would have thought a bunch of roses and a card from Clinton’s could have done all that?

Valentine’s Day did not exist until 496 AD. That was when the Pope fixed the date in memory of at least three martyrs called Valentine about whom not much is known.

The date became associated with romantic love in the middle ages and was deleted from the calendar of saints in 1969, by which time it had taken on a much broader meaning in Western popular culture. Particularly among card manufacturers.

Uzbekistan is not alone in opposing it. The Russian city of Bolgorod banned it because, they say, it promotes promiscuity. “The very atmosphere of these holidays does not foster the formation of spiritual and moral values in youth,” their guardians of moral outrage have declared.

Saudi Arabia has banned it and Malaysia has warned Muslims against celebrating it on the grounds that: “In reality, as well as historically, the celebration of Valentine’s Day is synonymous with vice activities.”

Oo-er, missus. All I ever got for a Valentine present was a kiss on the cheek. I was obviously celebrating it in the wrong country.

Iran, where 70% of the population is under 30, banned it because it was getting too popular. But this was probably because it was yet another westernising influence on its young population rather than posing any threat to public morals.

The authorities have also this week cracked down on toy shops selling Barbie dolls, which have been described as Trojan horses used to sneak into Iran, western influences such as makeup and revealing clothes.

I wonder what they think of My Little Pony?

But whatever isolated pockets of bigotry in other parts of the world might think, Valentine’s Day will be acknowledged by most people, not for its Christian connections, but as a day to celebrate romance.

And how can that be wrong?