Smile and live longer.

Having a chuckle on a regular basis is medically good for you, according to researchers at Kansas University.

People who smile have a 70% chance of living until they are 80.

Grumpy clogs who don’t, have only a 50% chance of doing the same.

If you smile while under pressure your heart rate and blood pressure remain lower than if you are frowning. So always look on the bright side of life.

Did you hear that a cement mixer collided with a prison van on Huddersfield ring road?

Police say they are looking for hardened criminals.

Then there was the crash on Bradford Road between a lorry full of tortoises and a wagon carrying terrapins. It was a turtle disaster.

I was left looking silly yesterday when I complained at Sainsbury’s that there were lumps in a jar of vinegar I had just bought. “Those are pickled onions,” I was told.

Not many people know this, but I used to be a tap dancer.

I had to give it up, though, because I kept falling in the sink.

That was about the same time that I went through a fashion phase where I wore a pork pie hat.

I had to stop – the gravy kept running in my eyes.

Go on, have a smile.

Do yourself good.