WE'RE smack bang in the middle of it. The night air, on a Saturday particularly, is filled with it.

The gentle chinking of glasses, the smell of sweat and aftershave and the boozy bonhomie of old friends who met just hours ago.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you wedding season.

Every years thousands of brides and grooms plump for a Saturday in August in the hope that Mother Nature will smile on their nuptials.

Good luck with that.

But what is it about weddings that cause such a split with some people loving the chance to get glammed up and others positively snarling at the fact they've had to buy John Lewis vouchers for someone they've never met.

I suppose the fact that you've got to fork out for a gift is one of the reasons.

I'm sure it used to be that you just used to buy something nice from Poundland or the Spar and hand it to a blushing, if not grateful, bride.

But not now. Oh no. If someone has lived together for ten years, has sired numerous offspring and are on the verge of paying their mortgage off despite holidaying abroad three times a year, they still retain the right to either ask you for a set of plates, the cost of which would make a sheikh weep.

And if you're not buying crockery or some other designer homeware to furnish their already luxurious pad they're after vouchers for their honeymoon.

Yes, they want you to pay for a fantastic holiday for them while you sit in this country as the rain and the rate of inflation race to see which can overwhelm you first.