ACCORDING to the latest warnings from medical experts we are all at risk of getting cancer unless we stop eating bacon butties.

Did you read the report? The World Cancer Research Fund analysed 40 years of international research into the link between lifestyle and cancer.

They said to avoid the disease everyone should stay as slim as possible, without being underweight, and not eat processed meat, such as ham, bacon and salami, and avoid drinking alcohol.

Ideally, no one should gain weight after the age of 21.

So that’s most of us up the Swanee without a paddle, then.

I mean, at 21 I weighed eight and a half stone and looked about as healthy as an albino twiglet. Once when I stripped off on a beach in Spain, someone called Oxfam. I needed extra weight for survival and most of it came from beer and chips.

Over the years, I have moved from an anorexic look, that would have given Kate Moss a run for her money, to a still slimmish 11 stone.

And my Auntie Doris lived into her 90s on a diet of bread and dripping and 20 full strength a day. She only stopped smoking because she woke up one morning when she was 89 and forgot that she did.

To be fair, the report makes good points but they come across with the subtlety of a sledgehammer.

One thing it is certain about, is that obesity is a killer.

The researchers found "convincing" evidence that excess body fat can cause six different types of common cancers, including those of the breast, bowel and pancreas. Add on other health problems associated with being badly overweight, and you can see a reason for changing your diet and lifestyle.

In 2004, nearly a quarter of men and women in England were obese, as well as 10% of girls and eight per cent of boys aged under 20.

The latest government report warns that if trends continue, 60% of UK men, 50% of women and a quarter of all children could be clinically obese by 2050.

Now that’s frightening and should make everyone think twice. No-one is expected to become a Trappist monk, join Weight Watchers and bang a tambourine for teetotalism. Most people wouldn’t want to change their lifestyle, unless they won the Lottery, but we can all try to nudge it in the right direction.

Take a brisk half hour walk everyday, eat sensibly and live longer.

You don’t have to cut out everything you enjoy. After all, a little of what you fancy does you good from time to time. Even the occasional bacon butty.