HAPPY cows produce more milk. It makes sense, actually, and some farmers have been known to play music to their beasts when they are in the milking sheds. Mozart to calm them down, Elvis for milk shakes.
Scientists at Exeter University are electronically tagging herds to find out how they interact with each other. Dr Darren Croft said: “Cows are social animals that form important group structures. We want to find out how important these are.”
I've often walked past the cows at the end of our road and said “Morning” but none ever replied with a cheery, “Morning, yourself,” so they are not that social.
But they do tend to group together for chats. To chew the cud with chums. As well as music, perhaps farmers should work out which beast has a sense of humour and give it a joke book. A comedy cow could provide on the hoof entertainment.
“Why does a milking stool have only three legs? Because the cow has the udder.”
“Why did the cow jump over the moon? Because the farmer had cold hands.”
“What do you get if you cross a cow, sheep, and a goat? The milky baa kid!”
The farmer who latches onto this possibility first could make a fortune.
After Pudsey the dog, Simon Cowell would love Clara the Cow on Britain's Got Talent.
