I USED a funny story last week about a rabbit that made a pub famous by going in every day for a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. Unfortunately, by the time the story appeared in this column, the gremlins had been at it, and the punchline was missing. Which is a shame.

Mind you, you could have always made up your own.

Anyway, for those who were confused, here's the condensed version. The rabbit kept to the same routine for ages until the landlord said he had no ham left. Would he have cheese and onion instead? So the rabbit had a pint and a cheese and onion toastie, but never came in again.

A year later his ghost appeared and the landlord said, “What happened?”

“I died,” said the rabbit.

“What of?”

And the rabbit said, “Mixin-me-toasties.”

(Hardly worth the bother, was it?)