My dad's harder than your dad! No, my dad's harder than yours.
So goes the age old playground argument. I hope I never get dragged into such a spat as frankly I'd make a blancmange look stiff
But down the years we’ve heard about hardmen - particularly in football.
The key to being a hardman was to be able to dish it out - and take it - but look like it didn’t bother you in the slightest.
Remember tough Terry Butcher with that bloody bandage around his noggin?
What about Ron 'Chopper' Harris? Not only did he put his foot in, but he tended to leave it there ... along with the rest of him.
Often mentioned is Norman 'Bite Yer Legs' Hunter. The uncompromising (translation - will take man, ball, mascot and anything that gets in way). Playing for Leeds he got his hardman reputation, so much so that when Hunter himself broke a leg, club trainer Les Cocker was informed “Hunter’s broke a leg”, and replied “Whose is it?”
You'd have to go some way to topple Duncan Ferguson whose on pitch head-butt ended up with him sentenced to three months in prison.
As if that wasn't a warning, someone else provoked 'Big Dunc's’ ire. Two foolish burglars broke into his house and were eyeballed caught by the burly Scotsman. One managed to evade him, the other didn't ... and spent three days in hospital recovering from his injuries.
But as football has become more family friendly and the players are more interested in Alice bands and gloves rather than extracting revenge for mistimed tackles the football hardman is now a dying breed.
But other sports are taking up the slack.
Take rugby league.
Look at the size of the lads playing it.
But just because they're big doesn't mean they're hard
Warrington Wolves' Paul Wood is though.
As well as being built like a brick outhouse our Paul has got balls.
Or rather ball.
In last year's Challenge Cup final against Leeds he took a stray knee to the family jewels, rupturing one of his testicles.
But he stayed on for 20 minutes more of rough and tumble action until being taken off by his coach.
He was then taken off to hospital where he had the offending body part removed.
When asked if it hurt, his magnificently understated reply was that "It does smart a bit when you get hit down there."
It's not just in contact sports where the new breed of hardman is being forged.
Just last weekend at the British MotoGP there were examples of supreme self control in the face of overwhelming pain.
First up, Marc Marquez. The Spaniard took a heavy fall in practice, dislocating his shoulder.
So far, so painful.
But, with the race just three hours away, he then popped it back in, hopped on his bike and managed to finish second.
I had a dislocated finger once and thought it was terminal so kudos to that man.
But the best 'hardman' story I've heard for a while was the same race. Britain's Cal Crutchlow was doing well in practice when travelling round the track at eye-watering speeds he began hitting himself.
Was he angry at the way things were going? No.
Furious that he wasn't on pole? No.
Did he have a wasp in his leathers? Er, yes.
So as he sped round Silverstone he began trying to see off the wasp - before it did the same to him.
After the incident he said: " "The crowd must have thought I was Tarzan because I was trying to kill the thing smashing my own chest, and I must have looked like a complete idiot."It stung me three times on my chest and I've had quite a few pains ever since, and I thought I was going to have a heart attack. It was still in there alive, and those sort of things don't help."
It appears the sporting hardman will still be around for sometime to come.