It’s that time of year again where the nation (OK, maybe just my house) goes Euro crazy.
I’m not starting an anti-Ukip party or planning to turn my meagre savings into the currency of France, Germany et al.
No, I’m talking about Eurovision.
This year it’s live from Austria after sparkly-dressed yet full-bearded contestant Conchita Wurst won it last year.
But who are the favourites? Well, we all know it won’t be the UK as the rest of Europe likes to keep us in our place by dishing out nil points on a regular basis.
In this year’s case we should probably be grateful to score nothing with the horrendously cheesy Electrovelvet.
This sub-Mambo No 5 hackneyed tune may be one that grows on you. Sadly for me I heard it once and then turned the radio off, vowing to never pollute my ears with it again.
The best bit of Eurovision is picking your favourite ditty and then cheering it home. If you don’t create a little sheet with a space for each entry and then a score then you haven’t lived.
If you were going to go all out you could even make a little buffet with chorizo for Spain, parma ham for Italy, turkey twizzlers for the UK. Actually, maybe just stick with the foreign grub.
So who is one of the Euro favourites? It is, of course, Australia.
Our Antipodean cousins are in for the first time due to, well it appears that some kind of PR hokum is at the root of it.
What better way to celebrate 60 years of the contest than inviting a country from the other side of the world? What will they do for 70 years? Try and find a race of people somewhere in a nearby galaxy and ask them to pop over for a good old sing song?
Australia’s entry didn’t even have to qualify – it’s straight through to the final along with the countries known as ‘The Big Five’ which are us, France, Germany, Spain, Italy and hosts Austria.
Oz’s entry is Guy Sebastian who will be singing Tonight Again and is already one of the favourites.
Apparently Bruce and Sheilas (is there a collective noun for Australians?) are big fans of the show.
Michael Ebeid, managing director of broadcaster SBS which airs the show in Australia, said: “We are very excited to have secured this historic opportunity for Australia to be represented on the world’s biggest stage at the 60th anniversary of the Eurovision Song Contest and are honoured that the European Broadcasting Union has supported us to achieve this ambition.”
Singer Guy, who appeared on Australian Idol, is already getting into the Euro-speak saying: “I don’t see music as a competitive medium – I went through that journey along time ago.
“Since then it’s about moving people, the power of music and what it can do for people.”
So who else is in the frame? Well, apparently Sweden are in the driving seat along with Italy.
The Swedish entry is called Heroes. I would write the name of the chap performing it but there’s too many of those Nordic signs above the letters in his name.
For Italy it’s a moody piano number by Il Volo called Grande Amore which I imagine means Big Love or something similar. Basically it’s about love.
It’s a breathy number that’s a bit Il Divo with a touch of the operatic about it before bursting into a pop song.
Basically it’s perfect Euro-fodder.
I wonder what the Australians will make of it?