A FATHER accused of murder threatened to kill his son and then himself on the boy’s fourth birthday.
A murder trial was yesterday read a chilling note addressed to his wife from Christopher Hawkins, 47, who said he and son Ryan were to die on September 16.
At Leeds Crown Court Hawkins denies murdering Ryan and trying to murder daughter Donna, 14, at his Slaithwaite home on September 23.
But in letters from jail Hawkins apologised for his actions, saying he prayed to Ryan for forgiveness every night.
The court heard that Hawkins had become enraged to find his wife Valerie Gee had started an affair with taxi driver and colleague Lee Tinker.
In the note addressed to Miss Gee Hawkins wrote: “Me and my son are going to die on September 16.
“But you weren’t thinking about that because you’re too busy sh***ing Lee...
“Me and Ryan are going to heaven...
“You have made me into a monster. I hope you suffer for the rest of your life.”
In a subsequent letter from his prison cell to his wife Hawkins apologised for killing Ryan.
He wrote: “I loved our son. I still don’t know to this day what came over me. I worshipped him.
“None of this would’ve happened if you weren’t having an affair with Tinker behind my back.
“I will pray to my son. I love him and miss him so much.’’
In a letter dated October 8, 2007 – 15 days after his arrest for the crime – Hawkins said: “I can’t remember stabbing Ryan or why.
“I’m so sorry it ended this way. I wish I could turn back the clock. I’m so sorry. I love you all.
“Tell Donna I’m so sorry for what I did.”
In another letter from prison – to the couple’s eldest daughter Natalie, 16 – Hawkins wrote: “I am suffering for what I did to Ryan, Donna and the family. I deserve to be where I am; that’s prison.
“I still can’t remember doing this sin. I can’t give an answer why.
“I’m praying every night to Ryan. I hope he will forgive me. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone.”
The court also heard about another letter from jail to two friends. In it Hawkins said he had become incensed after Donna had accused him of being an unfit father.
Donna had been to collect Ryan from her father’s house in Royd Street, Hill Top, when she found her brother had wet his pants.
Hawkins wrote: “I just saw red. I just don’t remember what happened. I don’t believe what I did.”
He admitted killing to pal in local pub
MURDER accused Christopher Hawkins confessed to a friend that he had stabbed his daughter moments after killing his son, a court heard.
Robert Burns told a jury he was drinking with his friend Hawkins at The Silent Woman pub in Slaithwaite on September 23 just minutes after the crimes.
Hawkins admitted stabbing 14-year-old daughter Donna and killing four-year-old Ryan.
Mr Burns said that after Hawkins had downed a pint he kept repeating: “I don’t know what I’ve done” after Mr Burns asked where Ryan was.
He said Hawkins had told him not to call the police because they would already be searching for him.
Mr Burns told the court that after they left the pub Hawkins said he would “top himself” with a gun he had at home.
He said he had seen a blood smear on Hawkins’s right forearm and that he looked unshaven and “rough”.
Eight days earlier Mr Burns had heard Hawkins say he would kill the man who was “carrying on’’ with his wife.
The trial has already heard claims that Hawkins attacked his children to get back at his wife, Valerie Gee, who was having an affair with a colleague at the taxi office where she worked.
Hawkins’s cousin, Stephen Borges, was also a witness yesterday.
He told the court he had seen Hawkins enter The Silent Woman with blood all over his forearms.
The pub used to be managed by Hawkins and his wife.
The court also heard from another friend, James Baillie. Mr Baillie said Hawkins had called him on the day of the killing, saying: “I don’t know what I’ve done” and said that he could have stabbed Donna.
The case continues.