Leave duty free drinks until after flight and save trouble

Jul 22 2008 by Our Correspondent, Huddersfield Daily Examiner

DID you read about that bloke on a flight from Gatwick to Cuba who got drunk and tried to open the door of the airplane at 35,000 feet?

He had apparently been drinking the duty free he had bought and taken on board.

The plane diverted and he was taken off the aircraft in Bermuda.

There is an easy answer to drink flying: ban the buying of duty free booze before you catch your flight. If airports want to continue to cash in on selling duty free alcohol, then locate an off-licence at the flight’s destination before passengers go through customs.

And why did the plane kick him off in the paradise islands of Bermuda?

Couldn’t they have dropped him off in a rubber boat in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle, instead, to teach him a lesson?

The only time I encountered any difficulties regarding in-flight alcohol was more than 30 years ago while flying to America courtesy of Pan Am.

The Boeing was only half full and yet, midway across the Atlantic, it ran out of beer.

“How come?” I asked.

“Well, you see that crowd of people round the service area?”

“Yes.”

“They’re Australian.”

The Aussies drank the plane dry but never caused a moment’s trouble, which is as you would expect. In my experience, Australians are professionals when it comes to imbibing the odd tinny or 12.

Unfortunately, some British travellers are distinctly amateur when they find the airport bar is open at seven in the morning before catching their charter flight.

These days, Maria and I never have a tipple on flights but we don’t mind those who do, as long as they don’t impose their behaviour on others.

Like trying to open the door at 35,000 feet.