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Denis: Bare facts about removing road signs

HAVE you heard about this new scheme to make motorists drive more slowly?

It’s known as “naked streets” and, before anyone starts getting excited about large parts of the district being declared centres of nudity, it means streets without signs rather than people without clothes.

Simon Taylor, a designer behind the project in Southampton, explains: “By increasing the potential risk of a minor accident, you in fact decrease the chances of it happening because people drive more carefully.”

Er, pardon?

Apparently it’s popular on the continent, but then, so are frogs legs and mayonnaise on your chips.

This is how it works: all road signs are removed and the lines on roads are obliterated with the intention of confusing motorists.

In this way, the designers expect totally confused drivers to slow down and watch what they are doing and come to equitable mutual agreement about space sharing with walkers and cyclists rather than shout, “Get onto the pavement, you idiot” only to discover they are driving across a pedestrian precinct.

Personally, I think a better bet would be centres of nudity. All road safety black spots should have signs saying: Slow Down - Naked People Ahead.

That would do the trick.

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