Denis : Summer has me hot and bothered

Jul 10 2009 By Denis Kilcommons

THREE hot days and it appears that summer is over.

Where is all that barbecue weather that the meteorological experts forecast?

On the strength of what they promised, I bought two new pairs of shorts and was tempted by a garden shower, for when the sun gets too fierce, and a new fan. No, not someone who wants my autograph but one of those big things that stands in a corner and throws out a cool breeze.

We’ve actually got a fan but it turns like a radar dish looking for enemy aircraft and makes a noise like a Messerschmitt on each pass. This can be a bit unnerving if you are watching television or trying to get to sleep.

“Run for cover, it’s coming back.”

Well I was a war baby and some defensive mechanisms are ingrained.

The garden shower was a neat device I saw in Lidl or Aldi, one of those stores that quite often stocks the unusual, like green chillies stuffed with Greek cheese or pigs ears in aspic. All it consisted of was a sprinkler on the end of a free standing metal frame to which you attached your garden house but the concept was brilliant.

A paddling pool in your back garden, play Agadoo by Black Lace on the stereo and one of these and you could close your eyes and think of Benidorm.