Denis: Tyke route to domestic bliss

Mar 2 2010 by Our Correspondent, Huddersfield Daily Examiner

I KEEP getting sent Yorkshire gags. Here's one from Phil Gale of Emley.

It's about three blokes in Kent who all got married at the same time. The first man married a girl from Essex.

He told her that she was to do the dishes and all the house cleaning. It took a couple of days but, on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and the dishes washed and put away.

The second chap married a woman from Sussex. He told his wife that she was to do all the cleaning, washing and cooking.

The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third bloke married a lass from Yorkshire.

“Right,” he said. “I want you to keep the house clean, the dishes washed, the lawn mowed, the laundry done and a hot meal on the table for when I get home from the pub.”

The first day, he didn't see anything. The second day, he didn't see anything either.

But by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little bit out of his left eye, and his arm had healed enough so that he could make a sandwich and load the dishwasher.