Powered by Google

John Avison: My advice is careering off

JUST before we start, I’d like to ask your advice: would you write ‘adviser’ or advisor’? Both are correct.Read

John Avison: Bonus balls

THE Royal Bank of Scotland chief executive officer Stephen Hester yesterday went on Radio Four to explain why he turned down his monster bonus.Read

John Avison: What a waste

MY morning constitutional takes me across a large tarmac car park next to woodland.Read

John: Battles with a conscience

WAR, much as we might say we abhor it, continues to fascinate.Read

John Avison: We are now recording artistes!

WE are recording artistes. This is not the royal ‘we’. This is Pete and me. You remember? The infamous band Jam To-morrow? No? Thought not.Read

John Avison: No fuel fool ...

CHAS Burnett is the friend of a friend and lives in Australia.Read

John: My memory stick mocks my achievements!

COMPUTERS and I are not best friends. The relationship I have with these complex but ultimately inanimate devices is love-hate, which I admit is a bit odd since a computer is nothing more or less than a tangle of electronic connections with some human interfaces like a keyboard for your fingers and a screen for your eyes.Read

John: Beware of Greeks bearing gossip

KEEP this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumour or spread gossip.Read

John: Fancy dress at Natalie’s birthday party, January 12, 2012

IT WAS fairly dark in Holmfirth Picturedrome last Saturday night, but I think I counted five Amy Winehouses.Read

John Avison: In the middle

THERE is a wonderful parable from Douglas Adams, author of Hitch-hikers’ Guide to the Galaxy, about why we have Kirklees Council.Read

John Avison: Plagued by doorstep sellers

AN Englishman's home is his castle. Within his walls, he may do pretty much as he pleases, without let or hindrance, it is said.Read

John Avison: The dangers of texting Christmas messages

YOU can’t get to see all your friends personally at Christmas so why not take advantage of modern technology and text them?Read

John Avison: Musing on our wonderful English language

I HOPE it goes without saying that this column is written in modern English.Read

John Avison: Tyke version of the Christmas story, December 22, 2011

“BY ‘ECK, Joseph, how much further is it? These public transport donkey saddles en’t doing me rumpumples any good at all.”Read

John Avison: Lack of singers

WE were horribly disappointed when no little tykes came round at Halloween chanting ‘trick-or-treat’.Read

John Avison: For my I's only

I’M really getting into the modern communications advances.Read

John Avison: No treasure in MY junk

DO NOT, it says in the Bible, lay up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal.Read

John Avison: For the good of Castle Hill

CASTLE Hill – by which I mean the whole hill, not the Victoria Tower or the disappeared pub – has been a bone of contention for 2,566 years.Read

John Avison: 12 days of Christmas

DOES it help to know that Auld Lang Syne means ‘old long since’?Read

John Avison: Politicians and entertainers

WHAT persuades a human being it might be a good idea to be a politician?Read