By heck, but I do get about a bit. And without ever leaving Huddersfield.
With nothing better to do, while sitting in front of the computer I Googled my name, like you do, and found I’m famous around the world.
Google has its eye on everything from my flickr photographs to my Facebook account and every mention in between. But it is the column I write for the Examiner that has been reproduced around the world. Whatever happened to copyright?
My views on tipping can be read on a website devoted to high finance. I’m quoted on international news and feature websites and reproduced in the Chester Chronicle. I’m alongside the Boston Strangler and on pages devoted to Nicole Kidman, which is nice. I like Nicole Kidman.
My definition of a “knocker up” is quoted in the Free Dictionary, I have been reprinted on a celebrity site in India that is devoted to Brad Pitt, a perceptive piece about alien abduction is on UFO Casebook, my critique of all that is wrong about the commercialism of Mother’s Day is listed under British and foreign news in The Week.
Stories I wrote years ago about Huddersfield band The Killermeters are on a rock ’n’ roll record site, and I’m included as a footnote in an online Bangladesh dictionary under the word ‘remove’.
I don’t think they mean this as a personal suggestion.
Then there is Silobreaker: “Overview page of events, news, people, companies, organisations.” This is packed with global happenings in Syria, China, Kenya and me. A whole section of my columns from the Examiner are reproduced. At the bottom is: Copyright (C) 2013 Silobreaker Ltd. All rights reserved.
Which is cheeky.
I’m proud to be featured on the website of Elmore Leonard, one of the greatest crime novelists of any generation, for my reviews of his books, and, in the most bizarre entry, I am credited with taking a photograph of world renowned white witch Pat Crowther.
I interviewed Pat at her home next to a graveyard in Sheffield 40 years ago. I also met her husband, who was a nice chap. They were the high priestess and high priest of a coven. He was also a magician at children’s parties. She was a delightful lady but I didn’t take the picture – some unnamed Examiner photographer did that.
The way the internet can capture and collate information is amazing – it’s like a machine taking possession of your soul. It’s also frightening if they get it wrong.
Me and the Boston Strangler? It wasn’t me, guv. Google it. I was in Africa at the time.