AS a lover of language, I was slightly disturbed to read that Cockney rhyming slang was not just in decline, but dying out, almost ‘brown bread’.

A study commissioned by the Museum of London found nearly 80% of Londoners did not understand phrases such as donkey’s ear’, which is, of course, slang for years, or Mother Hubbard, meaning cupboard.

Then I realised why so many Londoners didn’t understand. Our capital city is one of the most ethnically diverse in the world.

More than 300 languages are spoken in London, which has more than 50 non-indigenous communities with a population of more than 10,000. In fact, recent estimates say 42% belong to groups other than white British.

No wonder they didn’t comprehend if a chap in the pub after work said: “Would you Adam and Eve it, look at the Harry Lime, the trouble and strife will be going Salvation Army because I promised the tin lids I’d be at the Pope (in Rome) to read them a Jackanory before they went up the apples and pears.”

Not that anybody ever talks like that, but you get the drift. I’ll bet you understand it, too.

Cockney rhyming slang started in the East End in the 1840s among market traders. It was a way of speaking to each other without punters catching on and was adopted by crooks to confuse the police.

Much of it remains in wide use around the country, although its origins may have been forgotten.

A barnet, meaning hair, has been in use since 1850 and comes from Barnet Fair. We all know what a tea leaf is, who tells porky pies, and who to call on the dog and bone. We use the expression rabbit to talk but probably don’t realise the full phrase is rabbit and pork, everybody has speculated on whether Brucie wears a syrup (of figs), told someone to use their loaf (of bread), or asked for a butcher’s (hook).

If you are on your tod you are alone but did you know it refers to Tod Sloan, a famous jockey (1874-1933)?

Cockney rhyming slang is no longer the preserve of cockneys. It has seeped into general usage and there are terms that are quite rude although you wouldn’t know it as their origins have been lost in the mists of time. Mind you, I think I can get away with saying I’ll be cream crackered when I’ve finished this.

Like all language, this particular slang has adapted and kept up with the times. A Ruby became a curry (after Ruby Murray the singer) and Claire Rayner says she was pleased as punch when her name entered the lexicon as another way of saying trainers.

“Do you like my knew Claire Rayners?”

David Crystal, honorary professor of linguistics at Bangor University, said: “Cockney slang was never very widely known as it started as a secret way for people to talk to each other. As soon as the slang became known, the cockney’s stopped using it

“What I’ve noticed is that there are still quite a lot of people out there inventing new rhyming slang. In my files I’ve seen in the last two or three years slang such as ‘he was wearing his Barack Obamas’, meaning pyjamas, and ‘he’s on the Adrian Mole’, meaning dole.”

But enough of all this work. I’m getting a right Geoff Hurst. It’s down to the old rub-a-dub for a few Britney Spears and, no, I haven’t a Scooby what time I’ll be home.