HERE are some thoughts for those who love the idiosyncrasies of the English language:

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

I went to a book shop and asked the sales assistant where the Self Help section was and she said: “If I told you it would defeat the purpose.”

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

Is there another word for synonym?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is it homeless or naked?

If the police arrest a mime artist do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Whose cruel idea was it have an ‘s’ in the word lisp?

Can an atheist get insurance against acts of god?