I AM not the most computer literate of people, even though I use one every day.

So I found myself in something of a quandary that might have been appreciated by Spike Milligan as I attempted to order some photographs online as Christmas presents.

“I’m walking backwards to Christmas,” Milligan once sang. “Across the Irish Sea …”

Ah yes, one of the lesser-known festive hits that never seems to get as much airplay as Slade or Bing Crosby.

Well, as I typed my name and address into the online order form, I discovered everything was coming out backwards. I was writing backwards to Christmas.

Huddersfield came out as Dleifsredduh, which might look good in a Harry Potter novel but was of no use in identifying where to post my snaps.

It had taken the best part of an hour to sort out which pictures I wanted printing, what sizes they individually deserved and how many copies of each to order (photographs of grandchildren had to be duplicated for daughters and the other grandparents).

And the confounded machine had suddenly decided to write in tongues – backwards.

Good grief, I thought. What if this was a permanent affliction? I would have to write my column for the Examiner backwards. One thousands words that were back to front. Would anybody notice?

The solution I usually use when faced with any computing dilemma is to close the thing down, give it time to compose itself and then re-start it again.

I do the same with the television and usually, unplugging it from its power base is akin to giving it a good talking to, and it more often than not is on its best behaviour when the power is re-connected.

But if I did that this time, I would lose the order I had so painstakingly compiled. There was nothing for it but to persevere with writing backwards.

Not just my name and address but my credit card details, as well.

By heck, what if the pictures were delivered to a Mr Snommoclik in Australia? What if a chap in New Zealand got the bill?

It took a long time but I did it and the order was accepted. Later, I closed down the computer and started it up again and, thank goodness, all was well. Which is why this column is written normally and frontwards and probably makes a lot more sense.

What do you mean, you hadn’t noticed?