ANYONE who uses the internet to find things out had better beware.
There are all sorts of sites that claim things are true when they aren’t.
My pal Bernie found the following which came with a claim that it had really happened.
To be honest, it doesn’t really matter as I’m sure you’ll agree.
It’s late at night in Alice Springs. A police patrol car is cruising past a notorious bar when the door is flung open and out stumbles a man who is clearly in a bit of a state.
The man falls over, picks himself up and heads in an anything but straight line for the car park.
The cops park in the shadows and wait.
More people come out of the bar. “Don’t do it, Dave!” one of them shouts to the drunk.
Dave is now hunting for his car keys. Other people push past him on the way to their vehicles and he falls over again.
“Steady as you go, Dave!”
He finally finds his keys, but can’t find the door lock and drops the keys.
Singing a mournful ditty out of tune – probably Waltzing Matilda – Dave scuffles through the dust, find the keys, opens the door and falls into his car.
After a bit more singing he shuts the door and tries to start the car.
The police watch as he finally gets the engine ticking over. He puts the car in reverse. He stalls it.
Finally, he weaves the vehicle out of the car park and onto the road where he drives rather slowly towards the centre of town.
Gotcha! The police race out and stop him.
“I believe you have been drinking, sir,” says the arresting officer. “Kindly blow into this breathalyser.”
Strangely, the breathalyser shows that Dave hasn’t touched a drop.
“How do you explain this, sir?” asks the puzzled policeman.
“I’m tonight’s designated decoy,” says Dave.