THERE may be a magnificent cathedral on an impressive hilltop setting.
You can hardly miss it as you approach the city of Lincoln.
The cathedral - famed for its dramatic west front - dates back centuries and is steeped in history.
Its beauty attracts thousands of visitors a year.
And waterways are a dominant feature of Lincoln's city centre, where the shopper can linger awhile and watch the swans glide by.
There are plenty of other landmarks, including a castle and historic Guildhall.
But Huddersfield is loads better - as everyone here can testify.
For one thing, we're not an isolated settlement in the middle of nowhere.
We've got better - and bigger - shops.
Lincoln hasn't got top boy band Blue coming to play in an award-winning stadium at the end of July.
It hasn't got a textile industry famed throughout the world.
It hasn't got Ben Shaw's pop.
And its only got 84,000 people - three times fewer than Huddersfield.
We can boast famous sons like film star James Mason and former Prime Minister Harold Wilson.
Noted names from Lincoln are . . . erm, that's about it.
And can it boast a European championship winning band like the Yorkshire Building Society Brass Band?
Can it heck.
On the education front, our university is far bigger than theirs - and it's got Star Trek actor Patrick Stewart as chancellor.
Lincoln football club's roll of honour is but a short document, while our team has won the League championship three times and the FA Cup once.
Oh, and we thumped them 2-1 away last Saturday.
WHY LINCOLN'S NOT ALL IT'S CRACKED UP TO BE:
* Despite Robin Hood's clothes being Lincoln green, we all know he was really from Yorkshire and is buried near Brighouse
* Linkin Park don't come from there - and have never been there
* The Lincoln biscuit has little connection with the city
* Abraham Lincoln never stepped foot there
* The Lincoln Handicap horse race is actually run at Doncaster.